A prostate massager is a curved toy designed to press on the prostate through the front wall of the rectum. To start safely, use one with a flared base, made of silicone, glass or stainless steel, with plenty of lube, and go slowly.
What the prostate is
The prostate is a gland about the size of a walnut. It sits below the bladder and in front of the rectum, wrapped around part of the urethra, and it makes some of the fluid in semen (Cleveland Clinic). Most of semen's volume actually comes from the seminal vesicles, which produce roughly half to four-fifths of it.
Because it sits right against the rectal wall, the prostate can be reached a few inches inside, on the side toward your belly. Many men find pressure there intensely pleasurable, which is why it gets called the male G-spot. Orgasms with prostate stimulation are often described as deeper or more full-body than penile orgasms alone. Experiences vary, and plenty of men feel very little the first few times.
Choosing a prostate massager
Material
The lining of the rectum is thin and easily irritated, and anything that goes there has to be cleanable. Stick to non-porous silicone, borosilicate glass or stainless steel. Porous materials like jelly and TPR hold on to bacteria and can't be fully cleaned, which makes them a poor choice anywhere and a worse one here.
Shape
Dedicated massagers have a curve that angles the tip toward the prostate. Some also have an external arm that rests on the perineum, the stretch of skin between the scrotum and the anus, for pressure on both sides at once.
A flared base
Anything used anally needs a flared base or a handle that stays outside the body. Objects can slip further in than you'd expect, and once a toy is fully inside, it isn't something you can reliably retrieve yourself. Sex toys are among the objects doctors regularly remove from the rectum, often in an operating room under general anesthesia (World Journal of Emergency Surgery, 2013). Never use a bullet vibrator or a straight toy without a base for this.
How to use a prostate massager the first time
- Get comfortable. A warm shower helps you relax, and going to the bathroom beforehand puts most people more at ease. Pick a time when you're not rushed.
- Use plenty of lube. The rectum doesn't lubricate itself. Apply water-based lube generously to the toy and to yourself, and reapply whenever things start to drag. Water-based is the safe choice with silicone toys, and our lube guide explains why.
- Go slowly. Rest the tip at the entrance, breathe out, and let gentle pressure do the work. Lying on your side with your knees drawn up, or on your back, works for most men. The massager only needs to go in a few inches, with the curve pointing toward your belly button.
- Use pressure, not thrusting. Once it's in place, small rocking movements, or gently clenching and releasing your pelvic floor, move the toy against the gland. If it vibrates, start on the lowest setting.
- Stop if it hurts. A sense of fullness is normal. Sharp pain isn't. Take the toy out and try another day.
If anal play is new to you in general, our beginner's guide to anal play covers warm-up and positions in more detail.
Cleaning and care
Wash the massager right after use with warm water and a mild soap or toy cleaner, and let it dry completely before storing it on its own. Solid silicone, glass and steel toys with no motor can be boiled; vibrating ones can't. Our cleaning guide has the routine for each material.
This is general information, not medical advice. Prostate massage isn't something to try on your own as a fix for pelvic pain or urinary problems, and if you notice pain, bleeding or anything that doesn't settle, see a doctor.
When you're ready to choose one, our anal toys collection lists the material for every toy. For a first massager, look for a slim, smooth silicone design with a gentle curve and a wide flared base.